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Break a Rule Newsletter # 7
I Scared Myself Into Making 8K This Week
My story starts with agreeing to be coached in a Roman colosseum.
To be clear, I actually only agreed to be coached in a public webinar. Saying “yes” just felt like throwing myself into a pit of lions for the entertainment of others.
I said yes to the peril of public scrutiny because the coaching was free for something I need.
More time.
I’m certain that the only thing standing between me and my plans to transform the world is more of that intangible gold that we spell with those 4 little letters—t.i.m.e.
Perhaps, like me, you often complain about how a lack of time is stopping you from being the superhero you could be. The money I’d make, the deals I’d close, the books I’d write, the respect I’d earn—they all live in hours that just aren’t included in the 24 I’m assigned each day.
I complain about the existence of dirty dishes, muddy floors, our eccentric pets, incomprehensible tax forms, an in-grown toenail, and for some unexplained reason, mold growing in the trunk of my car.
And I take great umbrage at any suggestion from the universe, especially in the form of my family members, that I should be the one to handle these things.
Can’t you see that I’m not that kind of superhero?!
There are, in fact, superheroes for these sorts of everyday things.
And for people like me who’d prefer to skip that small phase of life called “growing up”—those kinds of superheroes are called “mothers”.
Now, my own mother is still alive. And I know for a fact that she would have been more than happy to keep handling such things for me over the course of the last 40 years—but like an idiot—I moved out at age 18.
And now, I struggle with time.
Given my challenges, you can only imagine what I did when I ran across an article titled, How to Be a Time Lord.
That’s right. I took the bait, and clicked.
The author was offering a webinar in which she promised to reveal . . . “a radically different way to understand our relationship to time.”
Ok, I thought. You got me. I’m filling out the webinar form.
It was a standard form. Until I reached the end and saw this.
“Would you like to volunteer to be coached on the call?”
Ok, wait a second.
I’m already going out on a limb here by admitting I have time (and mommy) issues, but now you want me to volunteer to be coached, live on the webinar?!
Perhaps there wasn’t room to include the whole, actual form question . . .
“Would you like to allow a few hundred random strangers who I found randomly lurking the halls of the internet to observe you while I expose your messed-up relationship to time, and thus your entire life, so they can judge you mercilessly from the comfort of their own home?”
Though not explicitly stated, it was abundantly clear to me this was implied in the fine print.
So I clicked "NO THANKS!” of course, and then scrolled to submit my form.
BUT . . .
Of the 7 Rules that I myself claim we are all born to break, the one singular rule I am derailed by, again and again, is the rule Be Independent.
The Be Independent rule leaves people like me running a project like Break a Rule without a single bit of help.
Writing, graphics, tech, payment systems, video editing, office admin, social media, booking travel, contracting clients—you name it, I DO it!
And for those of you who read last week’s challenge for breaking the rule Be Independent, you already know the challenge was titled, Borrow Something.
This challenge is to ask to borrow something that would be of use to you that is owned by someone else.
A clever, simple, and clear challenge (if I do say so myself) gently nudging the challenge-ee to step a little outside of the comfort zone of independence.
Now, I invented the Break a Rule model because it’s useful to me.
I’d been holding this challenge in my attention all week.
As a result, when I attempted to scroll down to the submit button on the webinar form and to hit “ENTER”—after saying “no thanks” to the live coaching—I noticed this challenge reminder note I had taped above my desk.
I stopped, and had to admit, this was a perfect opportunity to borrow something.
In this case—the insight, expertise, and TIME, of a legitimate success coach and PhD to help me in my life.
So I clicked the YES box and sent it in!
The webinar hasn’t happened yet. But that doesn’t matter, I’m sharing this story with you because of the instant benefit I received when I stepped outside of my own comfort zone, and committed to participate in my own life.
Just in this small way.
I immediately felt my spirits lift. I was less sleepy, and able to take action on a few items I had been stalling on due to low-level fear.
But get this.
One of those action items was making a simple phone call I’d been putting off, and actually making that call resulted in booking a new speaking engagement.
So basically, I made $8,000 for entertaining that challenge this week and keeping it in my attention.
That’s how this stuff works.
If you want an amazing life, you’re responsible for keeping your courage muscles toned and active.
The habit for all of us—me included—is to arrange our lives so we can stay asleep to our pesky little hesitations and fears; not risking, not pursuing a vision, not speaking up.
And the result of doing that is that we lose track of the presence of fear in our body, and that’s a problem.
Because the amount of fear we are willing to entertain equals the measure of life we are willing to embrace.
So here’s the thing.
It doesn’t take a lot of time to make the headlines of your own life, to do worthwhile things, and unlock hidden opportunities for personal and professional profit of all kinds.
And, there will still be time to walk the dog, do the dishes, and call your mom to say thanks for being a superhero in your life.
It just takes the willingness to embrace small fears, small discomforts, and develop the habit of taking intelligent risks.
Break a Rule Is a Courage Gym
Some of you have gym memberships.
Those of you who actually use your membership know that your fitness level is at least maintained, if not strengthened, by regular exercise.
Similarly, we all have courage muscles.
And I’m literally talking about parts of the brain, neural pathways, components of the endocrine system, glands and other internal squirting organs that—when they are toned, exercised, and firing properly—allow you to smoothly move into action when you need to take a worthwhile and intelligent risk.
For example:
If you suddenly recognized George Clooney walking down the other side of the street, but you never exercise, you could easily pull a muscle trying to sprint across traffic, catch up with him, and grab him from behind to ask if he already has sufficient amounts of life insurance. You’d also heal very slowly after you were mercilessly tackled by his bodyguards before you ever got close to him.
Similarly, if you never exercise your courage, your chances of being brave enough to accost George Clooney in the first place are very low, which in this case, would have spared you a violent encounter with his private protection police.
What’s abundantly clear here is that I’ve completely failed to argue the point that more courage is actually a good thing.
But, just in case you possess the rare ability to think intelligently for yourself, and you’ve somehow come to the conclusion that taking thoughtful risks is in your favor, you might be resonating with the idea of exercising in a Courage Gym.
Here, inside Break a Rule, there are 7 work-out stations.
You can find those “stations” in what is called The Challenge Library. Each station currently has six “exercises,” but over the course of this year a total of 50 exercises will be loaded into each station!
Wow.
That provides you with a tremendous range of ways to strengthen your courage muscles. And this Courage Gym is open 24/7, 365 days a year.
Every week, I send you new, free exercises in the form of the challenges. These challenges are like free gym passes.
To redeem your pass, just choose one of the challenges below from this newsletter.
If you want access to ALL the exercises, all the time, just upgrade your membership to become a paying subscriber.
And soon, your courage membership is going to include some incredible extra perks that are going to make you feel insanely fortunate that you stuck around long enough to let me figure out just what those perks might be.
This Week’s Challenges
The numbers don’t lie, as they say, and according to mine, there are many of you who won’t make it this far.
That’s too bad, but for those of you still with me, I can share this.
Even if I write this whole newsletter, and all of these challenges, just for myself—it’s a win. The profit I get from practicing this model of professional development continues to drive serendipity, abundance, and growth in my life. I make an income that puts me in the top 10% of the population by over-filling water glasses—no joke. I expect this equally weird Break a Rule project to lead to remarkable results.
So here are the challenges I’ll be playing with this week.
If you want to join in, pick one, tape it to your forehead, and ask your friends and family to read it to you every time you start acting like you’re stuck, bored, or that life itself is not a frickin’ miracle to be embraced each and every day.
Here are the challenges:
Break the Rule Be Normal
Break the Rule Avoid Mistakes
Break the Rule Be Independent
Break the Rule Stay Comfortable
Break the Rule Pretend You Don’t Matter
Break the Rule Stay in Control
Break the Rule Be Popular
Hi. My name is Rick and I’m your new RAO
RAO stands for Risk Acceleration Officer.
And yes, I admit that I hired myself on your behalf to fill this role for you, but hey, that’s just the kind of cool shit that can happen when you’re willing to break some rules.
I’ll be performing the opposite duty of a standard risk manager, whose job description focuses on risk mitigation.
Instead, I’ll be making sure you are embracing new risks, and that you experience just the right kind of risk acceleration.
My goal as your RAO is to NEVER allow you, in your lifetime, to fall into the tragic—and unfortunately common—delusional pride of having assembled a paper-clip daisy-chain at your desk in lieu of making something courageous and useful happen.
You’re welcome.
Enjoy this week’s challenges.
Misbehavingly yours,
Rick
From the archives
A Risk Acceleration Officer. Man, I love it.
Also love how you sign off with "Misbehavingly yours, ".
You're making people live their most authentic lives, and that is a noble mission. You have my respect.
It is interesting to me somewhere along the way we have determined a significance threshold for our actions. Courage looks different to each of us. Is one act of courage more courageous than another? I think this is a rather impossible game to play. Some acts of courage lead us in the exact direction we were searching for. Other acts of courage might strip the roads away. Some may have dollar bills at the end of the decision; others may require giving money away. But the important part, like you said, regardless of the act, is that you took a bet on yourself. Like Brene Brown has said a million times over, there is no courage without vulnerability. These actions feel exposing and scary. However, in my opinion, for what it is worth, no act of courage outweighs another. Where we see returns is continued courage - keep taking bets on yourself; keep leading with vulnerability.
I am so happy you said yes to being coached in front of a room of viewers. There's no way they don't love you Rick! Button click or saving the world, you should be proud of yourself.