Welcome to your first challenge
You had enough curiosity and openness of mind to take the Rule Finder Quiz, and perhaps you’ve discovered that you’ve been following the rule, Be Independent. Now you’re ready to explore what you can do about it.
You’re in the right place.
Humans are tribal creatures.
We’re designed for connection and collaboration. We survive and thrive on the basis of cooperative efforts, caring for each other’s needs, and sharing resources.
But humans are imperfect. None of us have been perfectly supported in our lives or always responded to when in need. We’ve all experienced what it’s like to be in need of help, but to have assistance be denied or unavailable. When this happens early in life it can produce tremendous fear and emotional distress. Since we can’t control the behavior of others, we attempt to prevent future pain by eliminating our needs.
This makes following the rule Be Independent look like an attractive prospect.
The problem is, complete independence is first of all practically impossible in today’s world, and secondarily disconnects us from the emotional and social benefits of human interdependence.
When cut ourselves off from the virtue and value of generosity we lose the capacity to receive it and provide it, and our ability to be part of a successful team is eliminated.
Want to break the rule Be Independent and be better at teamwork?
Here’s the Challenge
Call for help
This simple challenge for breaking the rule Be Independent will help you reconnect to your vulnerability and practice letting in the support of others.
Pull out your favorite writing tool to engage this quick exercise.
Name one thing you could use help with but haven’t asked anyone for support with.
Name the person you’re most likely to get reliable help from in this area.
Name one thing you can remember being really glad you got help with and describe how it felt to get that help.
As you can see, this is just a self-awareness exercise to reconnect to ways you might be avoiding a need for help, recall the benefit of doing so, and identify someone trustworthy in your life.
Give yourself the time and space to go into as much detail as you wish in answering each of these.
There is no right response in terms of length, content, or clarity. Simply let yourself explore the exercise and record what arises.
Just explore what’s there for you.
If you’re reading this on the go and want to work with the challenge later, just use the share button to send a copy of the challenge to your own email address.
Want more challenges like this?
If you enjoyed this first challenge and you’d like to see a few more sample challenges for breaking the rule Be Independent and becoming a better team player—just click the button below.
Welcome again, and if I can be of any help, please let me know by replying to your welcome email or any other email sent to you from Break a Rule.
Rick Lewis
Professional Misbehaver &
Break a Rule Founder