Welcome to your first challenge

You had enough curiosity and openness of mind to take the Rule Finder Quiz, and perhaps you’ve discovered that you’ve been following the rule, Be Normal. Now you’re ready to explore what you can do about it.

You’re in the right place.

Humans are unique.

Each and every one of us has unique strengths, eccentricities, and shortcomings. Accepting the entire package of these is the key to finding our natural and most fitting contribution in the world.

There was a time that we had no problem doing this.

But, we’re trained to fit in rather than stand out, conform to the norms and conventions of culture to make it easier for society to operate with limited approaches to things like education, fashion, politics, and career paths. In addition, we’re also trained to give the stink eye to anybody who dares to be different. We stop inviting them to parties, leave the lunch room when they enter, or ignore them in meetings and public places.

It’s painful to embrace our differences and be overlooked, or even shunned. This makes following the rule Be Normal a safe, though not very fulfilling, lifestyle.

The problem is, when we hide our authenticity, especially regarding our feelings, it’s hard for others to get to know us, and even harder to get to know ourselves. And knowing ourselves is the fundamental way we find our own unique success path as a professional.

Want to break the rule Be Normal and be more authentic in your life?

Here’s the Challenge

Own your weird

This simple challenge for breaking the rule Be Normal will help you reflect on what you may be suppressing in the name of fitting in. As an exercise in self-awareness it will help you see if there is a gap between the real you and the public you.

Pull out your favorite writing tool to engage this quick exercise.

• List ten things about yourself you think are weird and typically keep to yourself.

• Now pick the weirdest thing and write down what you imagine others would think of you if they knew this.

• If you had to tell one person who didn’t already know this thing about you, who would it be?

Give yourself the time and space to go into as much detail as you wish in answering each of these.

There is no right response in terms of length, content, or clarity. Simply let yourself explore the exercise and record what arises.

The first step in the rule breaking journey starts with gentle self-awareness. There’s nothing you have to do here, you’re just planting seeds for your unfolding.

If you’re reading this on the go and want to work with the challenge later, just use the share button to send a copy of the challenge to your own email address.

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Welcome again, and if I can be of any help, please let me know by replying to your welcome email or any other email sent to you from Break a Rule.

Rick Lewis
Professional Misbehaver &
Break a Rule Founder

Welcome to your first challenge

You had enough curiosity and openness of mind to take the Rule Finder Quiz, and perhaps you’ve discovered that you’ve been following the rule, Avoid Mistakes. Now you’re ready to explore what you can do about it.

You’re in the right place.

Humans are a curious and inventive species.

We’re hardwired from the start to experiment, explore, risk, and put absolutely anything into our mouths, including spinach and broccoli. As a result, we learn and grow at a remarkable rate in the first years of life, with exception of those children who eat more than 20% of their sandbox.

The curious part of us is always ready to try something new.

But that all slows down and for some of us eventually grinds to a complete halt as we’re taught that getting the answers right on the school test is more important than learning new things and gaining life experience.

Once it dawns on us that looking good is the goal and that mistakes are not tolerated, we become easy targets for the rule Avoid Mistakes, and gladly adopt it as our “winning” strategy.

The problem is, learning and growth are then virtually eliminated from our lives. Creativity, play, and innovation take a back seat to a regular paycheck and it becomes impossible to find the unique success path that we were meant to discover and then serve with joyful purpose.

Want to break the rule Avoid Mistakes and be a better innovator?

Here’s the Challenge

Name your failures

This simple challenge for breaking the rule Avoid Mistakes will help you move past your need for unerring performance and embrace intelligent risk. As an exercise in self-awareness it will help to shift your focus from avoiding mistakes to exploration and discovery.

Pull out your favorite writing tool to engage this quick exercise.

• Describe one mistake in your life you’re glad that you made.

• Identify one mistake you’re currently afraid of making.

• Name one thing you haven’t tried, but you’d be proud to have attempted, even if you fail at it.

Give yourself the time and space to go into as much detail as you wish in answering each of these.

There is no right response in terms of length, content, or clarity. Simply let yourself explore the exercise and record what arises.

If you’re reading this on the go and want to work with the challenge later, just use the share button to send a copy of the challenge to your own email address.

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Welcome again, and if I can be of any help, please let me know by replying to your welcome email or any other email sent to you from Break a Rule.

Rick Lewis
Professional Misbehaver &
Break a Rule Founder

Welcome to your first challenge

You had enough curiosity and openness of mind to take the Rule Finder Quiz, and perhaps you’ve discovered that you’ve been following the rule, Be Independent. Now you’re ready to explore what you can do about it.

You’re in the right place.

Humans are tribal creatures.

We’re designed for connection and collaboration. We survive and thrive on the basis of cooperative efforts, caring for each other’s needs, and sharing resources.

But humans are imperfect. None of us have been perfectly supported in our lives or always responded to when in need. We’ve all experienced what it’s like to be in need of help, but to have assistance be denied or unavailable. When this happens early in life it can produce tremendous fear and emotional distress. Since we can’t control the behavior of others, we attempt to prevent future pain by eliminating our needs.

This makes following the rule Be Independent look like an attractive prospect.

The problem is, complete independence is first of all practically impossible in today’s world, and secondarily disconnects us from the emotional and social benefits of human interdependence.

When cut ourselves off from the virtue and value of generosity we lose the capacity to receive it and provide it, and our ability to be part of a successful team is eliminated.

Want to break the rule Be Independent and be better at teamwork?

Here’s the Challenge

Call for help

This simple challenge for breaking the rule Be Independent will help you reconnect to your vulnerability and practice letting in the support of others.

Pull out your favorite writing tool to engage this quick exercise.

• Name one thing you could use help with but haven’t asked anyone for support with.

• Name the person you’re most likely to get reliable help from in this area.

• Name one thing you can remember being really glad you got help with and describe how it felt to get that help.

As you can see, this is just a self-awareness exercise to reconnect to ways you might be avoiding a need for help, recall the benefit of doing so, and identify someone trustworthy in your life.

Give yourself the time and space to go into as much detail as you wish in answering each of these.

There is no right response in terms of length, content, or clarity. Simply let yourself explore the exercise and record what arises.

Just explore what’s there for you.

If you’re reading this on the go and want to work with the challenge later, just use the share button to send a copy of the challenge to your own email address.

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Welcome again, and if I can be of any help, please let me know by replying to your welcome email or any other email sent to you from Break a Rule.

Rick Lewis
Professional Misbehaver &
Break a Rule Founder

Welcome to your first challenge

You had enough curiosity and openness of mind to take the Rule Finder Quiz, and perhaps you’ve discovered that you’ve been following the rule, Stay Comfortable. Now you’re ready to explore what you can do about it.

You’re in the right place.

Humans are naturally industrious.

The human psyche and spirit are designed to function at their best when the body is regularly and thoroughly engaged in life. Harvard Medical School and countless other studies have verified that if you want to improve your life, the number one thing you can do is get more exercise. And it’s natural. The first years of our lives are filled with far more movement and activity than contemplation, problem-solving, and rumination.

But a culture of convenience is weaning us away from the natural benefits of physical engagement. As we become accustomed to comfort and the lack of necessity for making physical efforts, our motivation for motion weakens. Marketing convinces us that not having to work is the ultimate goal of a career, and that sweating will reduce our attractiveness and social acceptance.

Unfortunately, all of this helps the rule Stay Comfortable seem appealing and gain momentum in our daily lives. The problem is, when we disconnect from our physical embodiment and the capacity to make extra efforts when needed, our productivity is bound to suffer.

Want to break the rule Stay Comfortable and improve your productivity?

Here’s the Challenge

Start a sweat log

This simple challenge for breaking the rule Stay Comfortable will help you reconnect to regular physical engagement and the benefits of moderate activity.

Pull out your favorite writing tool to engage this quick exercise.

You’re going to answer three simple questions in relationship to your physical activity.

The questions are:

• What are the activities I could engage in my life that I know would cause me to break a sweat?

• Which of these activities would also provide me with a sense of accomplishment, achievement, or well-being? (i.e. gardening, exercise, house cleaning, etc)

• If I got in the habit of breaking a sweat every day I think I would feel . . .

Give yourself the time and space to go into as much detail as you wish in answering each of these. There is no right response in terms of length, content, or clarity. Simply let yourself explore the question and record what arises.

If you decide that getting physically active more often would be worthwhile, consider starting a “sweat log.” Keep a running list for 30 days of activities you’ve engaged to the point of breaking a sweat. If you can manage to get a 30-day streak going, you’ll be well on your way to forming a reliable habit.

If you’re reading this on the go and want to work with the challenge later, just use the share button to send a copy of the challenge to your own email address.

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Thank you

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Welcome again, and if I can be of any help, please let me know by replying to your welcome email or any other email sent to you from Break a Rule.

Rick Lewis
Professional Misbehaver &
Break a Rule Founder

Welcome to your first challenge

You had enough curiosity and openness of mind to take the Rule Finder Quiz, and perhaps you’ve discovered that you’ve been following the rule, Pretend You Don’t Matter. Now you’re ready to explore what you can do about it.

You’re in the right place.

Humans are born with dignity and self-worth.

We come into the world with an innate connection to our value, the rightness of our existence, and the instincts to pursue what keeps us healthy and whole.

That dignified part of ourselves knows we should take care of ourselves.

Many of us, however, have grown up with models for self-care. We’ve seen parents, care-givers, teachers, and authority figures abuse their own well-being and health under the guise of a strong work ethic, sometimes even commenting that our existence is what drives them to neglect themselves to “keep food on the table.” As a result, some of us feel guilty about taking care of ourselves when others claim to have suffered to do that for us.

The truth is, Pretending You Don’t Matter, is the quickest way to numb your capacity to make a difference in the world. Because disconnecting from our needs requires that we disconnect from our feelings, and it’s those very feelings that inform us about what’s worth serving, defending, and preserving.

Pretend You Don’t Matter has become an unfortunate substitute for dignity, a tarnished badge of honor that is then passed from generation to generation, distancing us from the quality of well-being that would allow us to stay tuned to the needs of others, because we’ve refused the needs of ourself.

Want to break the rule Pretend You Don’t Matter and improve your resilience?

Here’s the Challenge

Care for yourself

This simple challenge for breaking the rule Pretend You Don’t Matter will help you bridge the gap from self-neglect to self-care.

Pull out your favorite writing tool to engage this quick exercise.

You’re going to complete three open-ended statements about your care for yourself.

The statement prompts are:

• The ways I know I’m not taking care of myself are . . .

• The one area of self-care I’m neglecting that most impacts my ability to care for others or to contribute to worthwhile endeavors in my life is . . .

• One small change I could make in my habits, schedule or behavior that would improve my self care would be . . .

Give yourself the time and space to go into as much detail as you wish in answering each of these. There is no right response in terms of length, content, or clarity. Simply let yourself explore the question and record what arises. This is just for you to reconnect to your own needs and discover what your body is telling you.

Just explore what’s there for you.

If you’re reading this on the go and want to work with the challenge later, just use the share button to send a copy of the challenge to your own email address.

Share

Thank you

Want more challenges like this?

If you enjoyed this first challenge and you’d like to see a few more sample challenges for breaking the rule Pretend You Don’t Matter and embracing your worth—just click the button below.

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Welcome again, and if I can be of any help, please let me know by replying to your welcome email or any other email sent to you from Break a Rule.

Rick Lewis
Professional Misbehaver &
Break a Rule Founder

Welcome to your first challenge

You had enough curiosity and openness of mind to take the Rule Finder Quiz, and perhaps you’ve discovered that you’ve been following the rule, Stay in Control. Now you’re ready to explore what you can do about it.

You’re in the right place.

Humans are social creatures.

We’re designed for connection, cooperation, and collaboration. We long to have good company, for the security of a trusted and bonded tribe.

The relational part of us is ready to be authentic and vulnerable.

But humans are imperfect. None of us have been perfectly treated at all times. We’ve all experienced painful incidents of disrespect, insensitivity, neglect, threat, or even bodily harm. Early in life we learn that being open and vulnerable at the wrong place and time doesn’t always work out.

This makes following the rule Stay in Control look like a safe and wise strategy. The problem is, other humans don’t respond well to someone who is living in a control tower, trying to direct traffic from above, and avoiding grounded presence with the team. When we’re invulnerable with others we lose the quality of connection, and without it, effective leadership is just not possible.

Want to break the rule Stay in Control and improve your leadership?

Here’s the Challenge

Control your tower

This simple challenge for breaking the rule Stay in Control will help you move past your need for control and restore your natural influence. As an exercise in self-awareness it will shift the focus from what others are doing, to taking control of your own tower.

Pull out your favorite writing tool to engage this quick exercise.

You’re going to complete three open-ended statements about the personal and professional relationships in your life.

The statement prompts are:

• Three people in my life I wish I had more control over are . . .

• The ways I currently attempt to control them are . . .

• One thing I could do with each of these people to foster connection would be . . .

Give yourself the time and space to go into as much detail as you wish in answering each of these.

There is no right response in terms of length, content, or clarity. Simply let yourself explore the exercise and record what arises. This is just for you to develop more awareness of where the control dynamic shows up in your relationships, and begin to consider actions you could initiate that would soften it.

Just explore what’s there for you.

If you’re reading this on the go and want to work with the challenge later, just use the share button to send a copy of the challenge to your own email address.

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If you enjoyed this first challenge and you’d like to see a few more sample challenges for breaking the rule Stay in Control and finding your own path to natural leadership—just click the button below.

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Welcome again, and if I can be of any help, please let me know by replying to your welcome email or any other email sent to you from Break a Rule.

Rick Lewis
Professional Misbehaver &
Break a Rule Founder

Welcome to your first challenge

You had enough curiosity and openness of mind to take the Rule Finder Quiz, and perhaps you’ve discovered that you’ve been following the rule, Be Popular. Now you’re ready to explore what you can do about it.

You’re in the right place.

Humans are visionary.

Whatever circumstance we’re in, we long for its highest potential to be realized. We want the best possible thing in our families, intimate relationships—for our companies, communities, and for our careers.

That visionary part of us is ready to boldly pursue change.

But humans have been known to resist and in some cases even eliminate those who strongly advocate for change, and so visionary thinking and action requires tremendous courage. If we promote change the wrong way in our human tribe, we can find ourselves abandoned by it, which is a frightening prospect.

This makes following the rule Be Popular look like a safe and compelling strategy. The problem is, when we disconnect from our vision we lose contact with what could be our highest contribution to others.

Want to break the rule Be Popular and reconnect to your vision?

Here’s the Challenge

Restore your vision

This simple challenge for breaking the rule Be Popular will help you reconnect to your purpose and the possibilities you most wish to serve.

Pull out your favorite writing tool to engage this quick exercise.

You’re going to consider one simple question, in relationship to four areas of your life.

The questions are:

• What’s the highest possibility I see with my family that isn’t yet true?

• What’s the highest possibility I see with my career that isn’t yet true?

• What’s the highest possibility I see with my partner that isn’t yet true?

• “What’s the highest possibility I see with my friendships that isn’t yet true?

Give yourself the time and space to go into as much detail as you wish in answering each of these. There is no right response in terms of length, content, or clarity. Simply let yourself explore the question and record what arises. This is just for you to reconnect to your highest vision in each of these areas. You don’t need to show it to anyone else or do anything with the result.

Just explore what’s there for you.

If you’re reading this on the go and want to work with the challenge later, just use the share button to send a copy of the challenge to your own email address.

Share

Want more challenges like this?

If you enjoyed this first challenge and you’d like to see a few more sample challenges for breaking the rule Be Popular and reconnecting to your purpose and vision—just click the button below.

See More Sample Challenges

Welcome again, and if I can be of any help, please let me know by replying to your welcome email or any other email sent to you from Break a Rule.

Rick Lewis
Professional Misbehaver &
Break a Rule Founder